How come it has to be so hard, when all we want to be is happy i don't understand. Why in the world -I mean how am i suppose to make sense of this and make a rational descion . when i can't even wrap my brain around it and i am in the middle of it all!!! I know this is the point in my life that i make that leap in to the next phase of life. i feel it i know what this feels like I have done this before. but just obviously not under these circumstances. before it was just me basically~ now i have a best friend who is my husband and 4 daughters. I know that all of this is going to be a growing experience and if i am able to go through this with any grace it could really bless the rest of my life and hopefully all of those around me.